‘Man up’ ain’t the answer for men's mental health issues, say experts
Antiquated gender norms, societal stigma and the concept of hyper-masculinity that hold men to unreasonably high standards are some of the reasons why men don’t seek help with their mental health problems
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CHENNAI: According to the World Health Organization, more number of men die by suicide each year than women. Though depression and its related mental illnesses are diagnosed more among women, social stigma, patriarchy, and other cultural factors prevent men from seeking professional help.
To put it in context, here’s a nugget. According to the National Records Bureau, out of the total number of suicides reported in the country (2022), 71.8% was men and the remaining were women.
In a culturally regressive society like ours, a ‘real man’ is often defined by his ability to remain stoic through any form of trouble, and not express his feelings through tears. ‘Real men don’t cry’ is a societal conditioning that leads to the development of toxic traits of hyper masculinity. Most importantly, the broody and intense alpha male, often misconstrued for strength among men, gets used to burying his feelings, and not seeking help for his mental health problems.
Mental health experts opine that depression and anxiety are two of the most common disorders seen almost two times more among women than men. However, such disorders lead to a higher prevalence of alcohol abuse and drug abuse among men.
“Men tend to ignore and/or dismiss their mental health issues, mostly due to the afore-mentioned social conditioning. It also explains why men have trouble admitting they need help. In this background, men are reluctant to seek advice and reassurance even within family members or social circles. Sometimes, the person may even resort to alcohol, smoking or other drugs to relieve stress rather than sharing their problems with friends or family or seek professional help,” says Dr Rakesh Kumar Chaddha, HoD-psychiatry, Amrita Hospital.
Grappling with social stigma, antiquated ideas about gender can also lend itself to a total lack of awareness about mental health issues among men. Often, depression and anxiety are not even recognised as illnesses among men. So, they do not get treated.
“Drug use disorders and/or addictions are just considered ‘bad habits’ which a person can overcome with strong will, discipline and determination. This, unfortunately, only exacerbates the problem,” adds Dr Rakesh. “Alcoholism, for instance, is now seen as a medical condition, and effective treatments are available. It’s very important for men to learn to express distressing thoughts rather than suppress them.”
Professional and financial concerns are two of the biggest stressors among men. Finding a job, maintaining that job for promotions and bonuses, and looking for avenues to earn more are some of the main problems that men face. Performance pressure at the workplace, anxiety to meet family expectations (‘man of the house’, ‘head of the family’, etc) and societal norms add to their burdens.
“Since men have the pressure of being the ‘earning member’ of the family, and also provide for their aging parents, many become workaholics, which creates a distance between them and their families,” elaborates clinical psychologist C Akshaya.
“Social conditioning is a powerful force. It makes men put more pressure on themselves to be logical and rational instead of understanding their emotions and expressing it. A lot of them turn to alcohol and drugs, which leads to other mental health issues. It’s a vicious cycle.”
Often highlighted as psychotic in nature, there are underlying issues such as anxiety, depression, obsessive compulsive disorder and other common mental health issues that go unnoticed and hence, undiagnosed, often leading to catastrophic consequences.
“The increase in suicides is an indication that men need support. Nobody wants to die by their own hand but they do want to end their suffering – most common reason for suicide. And, thoughts of self-harm are preventable if mental health challenges are addressed at an early stage,” says Vandhana, clinical psychologist V-Cope.
Experts say that more conversations on men’s mental health issues, sans judgement and stigma, enables them to express themselves. By fostering an environment where it’s openly discussed, society can create a more supportive culture for men to address their toxic traits and seek professional help.
“It’s actually helpful when celebrities talk about their mental health struggles. It enables free-flowing conversations within family, also allows men to be vulnerable, and express their thoughts of self-harm, if any, and other tribulations. It also helps family and loved ones to be supportive,” she adds.
“Though there are other bio-psychosocial issues that also impact them, men should be encouraged to express their worries and concerns, and not imbibe the stereotype.”
How to offer support
Break the stigma: Men are conditioned to suppress their emotions and avoid showing vulnerability, which can lead to untreated mental health issues. Normalising these conversations and encouraging emotional expression enables men to seek help without feeling ashamed or weak
Encourage help-seeking behaviour: Open dialogue about mental health can encourage men to seek professional help or support from friends and family
Provide education and awareness: Educate the public about the signs and symptoms of mental health issues and thoughts of self-harm as way to encourage them to seek timely intervention
Reduce risk factors: Substance abuse, relationship issues, financial stress, lack of social support, etc., must be addresses as a family. Understanding these factors can lead to proactive measures and healthier coping mechanisms